I am writing this, literally this minute, with a baby goat curled in my lap. This is not allegory, nor is it an analogy for some larger point - there's just a baby goat curled up between my crossed legs as I balance my laptop on my foot.
Farmers, like Moms, have to multitask. When you're both, I guess you just learn to multitask twice as hard. I can't remember the last time I was doing just a single thing; I try to imagine I'm like a Swiss Army Knife-human - or more appropriately, a Leatherman. We all need pliers more than another nail file. If someone made a Leatherman with a wine opener, I would be that tool.
I can't be everything to everyone, but hopefully, I can at least try to be what's needed at any moment.
Right now, what I need to be is both a writer and a baby goat heater; luckily, the two are not mutually exclusive.
It snowed today. It was one of those heavy spring storms that blew in, making me feel for about four hours like maybe we have finally entered the new ice age from which we will never recover. Just as quickly, it picked up its wintry petticoats and floated off, leaving behind the water we desperately needed.
This morning I milked in a full winter flurry, this evening in a chilly mud puddle. I left the baby goats out in the pasture since it never got dangerously cold; it was just heavy spring snow. But, I went out several times to make sure all were doing ok. We have eight babies here, so I counted to eight multiple times over the day while ensuring I had eyes on each one.
I might now know a bit how my boys' preschool teachers feel - they don't get paid enough.
I went out to milk tonight and found one little girl hovering in the back of the pen shivering a little. It wasn't bad - she was alert, up, and running around. She wasn't in any real mortal danger - but all the other babies were all fat and happy, and I noticed she just barely shivered as I counted. It was just the ghost of a shake.
One of the complex parts of goat ownership - or any prey-animal keeping - is that prey animals are designed to hide when anything is less than optimal. Unlike more common predator pets, like cats and dogs, having animals whose deep brains keep telling them that they're food for others means they will never appear weak or hurt, lest they be targeted for lunch.
Keeping prey animals means you have to hone your observational skills.
So, when I went out to milk tonight, I noticed just a slight shiver. When I came out of the "milking parlor" (literally a half-shed with no electricity), I saw yet another tiny shake from this little girl. She's one of Late's quads. Although Late is a great Mom, she's feeding THREE babies (one is already out the door), so I keep a close eye on each one.
This little girl is already sold. Her name, by the way, I found out today - is Charlene. Her new human Mom is a fan of Joe Diffie - I think we'll be friends. So, I saw two tiny shivers from Charlene, and I scooped her up and brought her inside.
The baby (human) and I warmed a bottle, fed her, and now she a ball into my lap, warming up until there is no trace of cold - slight or otherwise.
She would be fine outside. I have no doubt that if I had just left her out, she would have fought her siblings for a meal and curled up in the same corner with her sister and been "just fine." But, I could tell that she wasn't feeling top-notch somewhere down in her core.
She probably doesn't even know that anything is amiss - I call her "Char" now, even though I just learned her name. Because there is something about pulling a being into life that creates a kind of unbreakable intimacy to make me feel I have earned that right.
So, "Char" is just curled up here, absorbing the warmth because I can make her stronger and healthier with my love and attention. There are only eight - and if they live here forever or if they head off to the home of a new friend I have not yet met, but who loves Joe Diffie, they are going to be the best and healthiest and sweetest goats they can be.
My goats will believe that people are their friends - like bottle-baby goats do - and they will fight the most core parts of their brain that say we just exist to eat them. Prey animals are more complicated, but in many ways can be more gratifying. Befriending an animal who believes you just want to eat it is much harder than an animal who thinks you want to be its best friend - like a dog - or serve it - like a cat.
Even a slight shiver deserves attention - you never know when you'll miss something important.
Please give Char a hug for me.
I love the image of you as a Leatherwoman - that should definitely be a real tool