My absolute favorite darling goat, Bella, got her star this week. Bella is almost four and carries herself like royalty even though she's due to give birth in under a month. So, right now, she's a very regal bowling ball. She didn't care if the certificate with her milk star was in my goat paperwork notebook or not; she knows she's the queen of the pasture.
I realize that a goat star means basically nothing for non-goat people, which is almost everyone. But, for goat people, finally getting that star is a big deal. It’s the seal of approval from the registry (yes, there are goat registries) that your goat is a top milker. It was the caprine award I was hoping for, and that Bella and I worked hard to get (yes, the goat and I worked as a team on this one) for almost two years. It's a big deal.
Bella is now officially recognized for the milk star that she is, and after several years languishing in goat illegitimacy, this is a big step for her.
Over three years ago, I found Bella in the place we all go for the new best friend who will change our lives - on Craigslist. (Disclaimer - do not actually look for new best friends on Craigslist, I don't want the liability of that outcome.)
Besides individual farm websites, Craigslist is the best place online to find and market farm animals for sale. Social media networks prohibit selling animals online, and there's no clear place to advertise. So, the online version of the classifieds from those free papers leftover at coffee shops became the place to go. Of course.
My proposed new tagline for them: "Not allowed elsewhere on the internet? Sure, we'll do that here. Why not?" Handblown glass bong? Craigslist. New dairy goat? Craigslist.
When Bella came home, I knew she was special. Getting a goat like her from a place like Craiglist was like getting a cute pair of shoes at the thrift store and bringing them home to find their Jimmy Choo tag was covered up with the thrift store price sticker.
To me, Bella deserved the recognition of the paperwork to validate her worth. So, we started the process of monthly milk testing (for fat %, protein %, and volume) to get her recognized as a "Native on Performance" doe with a star (*) designation after her name. The star gives her and her kids registered status based on her adherence to breed standards combined with milk output.
At her peak, Bella was running over 8% butterfat; for reference, half and half is about 10-12%. She's several percentage points higher than any other goat in our yard and bonkers when it comes to fat production. The cheese I make from her creamy milk is like eating magical clouds.
So, we finally got the word this week. Bella got her star based on her fat and volume output in 2021. It was so much time and so much work, and I thought it would feel . . . better somehow. But relativism gets to all of us, and the last goal met quickly becomes the next one in front of you. Now I think about the next goats and the next show; there's always a "next."
Here's the thing, though. With or without a star, Bella will show up the next day, every day. She'll put the milk in the bucket. She'll prance around like she owns the place, eat her hay, and give me her bucket of half and half. And then she'll do it again, and again.
Now she has the official honor and the status, but she's not letting up. There's always tomorrow's bucket to fill.
I started this Substack the day after being laid off in September of 2021.
It was one of those galvanizing moments that manages to be both terrifying and somehow exhilarating. But with nothing to lose, there was no reason that it wasn't time to take the moonshot of finally being an actual "writer."
Because of how great each of you are who read this (by the way, did you know I have a premium Substack, too? Subscribe today!), it is transforming from a hobby to a quasi-professional endeavor. I'm humbled every time I get the notification of a new subscriber, which, luckily, is often.
So, I realized the other day that I have been doing this, so far, twice a week, for more than four months. Most of my posts average about 1000-1200 words. Therefore, I have written north of 32,000 words so far here. It's crazy to consider. The average book is about 90,000 words, give or take. Here, so far, I have written a THIRD OF A BOOK, fueled by you.
It's a lucky thing, to accidentally fall into friendships with people who do those things you aspire to. I happen to have several friends who either have or are currently writing books. To me, my friends are real "writers." They're the talented ones, and I look on and wonder what it is that I bring to the table.
It's not like "write a book" was ever something I thought was a particularly attainable goal. Like, "run a marathon" or "go to space," the idea of writing an entire book always seemed like something that other, more talented people did. It's always been POSSIBLE but just out of reach. Best leave the actual writing to the real writers.
Though, this week, the realization hit me that if I just keep doing what I'm doing and don't stop, I could also be a person who writes a book. I know many other people who have written books, and I could be one of them. Maybe.
One of my close girlfriends knew what we needed, and we're heading to a hotel and kids to write for two whole days at the end of the month. I assume the plans will be to eat, drink, write, and eat more, in that order.
The dictionary defines a writer, no joke, as "someone who writes." Helpful. But also, I'm working on this transition from "someone who writes" to "writer." Bella never had to go through the evolution from "paperless illegitimate goat" to "milk star goat" because she was always a star in her head. But, she also showed up did the star work.
Bella did it. She got her star because she gets up every day and puts the half and half in the bucket. There never was a single major victory; it was a small series of successes and choices on the margins. She ground it out every day. Bella never questioned if she was star-worthy. She just kept going. Maybe there's a star out there for us, too, we just have to keep going.
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The main way that new people find this is by you sharing it. If you share it a baby goat gets her star (not really, that’s not how it works).
We should all aspire to get our “star”
This week I will aspire to get my “wore pants everyday” star..... but I hope to find my star for something much greater soon!
PS.... getting to read a whole
Book by you would seriously be an absolute treat! I’m rooting for you.
Beautiful Bella got her star*….well deserved, and a round of applause for her faithful staff!